What I’m Reading: Pizza and Porn

Yesterday, I quoted Mr. Rogers. Today, I’m talking about porn. That is the first time you’ve seen those nouns used together, right? Welcome to my world—a world where Mr. Rogers and porn can be used side-by-side with confidence and without trepidation. Or, something like that.

I started reading a new book: YOU’RE A MIRACLE (AND A PAIN IN THE ASS). This book is the latest from Mike McHargue. He’s a science guy, yet he’s also quite relatable. You see, Mike and I both share an affinity for pizza. Sidetrack time.

Pizza is awesome

I grew up in Ohio and enjoyed the Pizza Hut buffets. There may have been a time where I was ashamed of admitting those things (being from Ohio or stuffing my face with corporate pan pizza). But Mike McHargue and I are pizza brothers. We stand up against pizza shaming. Or, better yet, we stand up against shame. I’ve written about it before, and that’s what his book is all about. It is about understanding who you are, how you operate, and–most importantly–how to be cool with it.

Shame sucks. I’m glad to have shed my shame (for the most part). Because now I live in the land of plenty: the homeland of pizza. According to Google, within a five-mile radius of my house, there are about 115 pizza places. Most of those pizza places have Italian names and refer to their “pies” as “apizzas,” loaded with “mootz.” Back on track time.

Mike’s vulnerable

Within the first 25% of Mike’s book, I’ve read him talk about his suicide attempt, his struggle with weight, his health issues, and other deeply personal and vulnerable struggles. That reminds me of a Churchill quote, “success is the ability to go from failure to failure without any loss in enthusiasm.” I love that quote. I live by that quote. Mike takes his issues, shares them with us as readers, and shows us that we are not perfect. And that’s okay.

I’m all about Mike’s analogies. He describes this human experience as being the “orchestra itself, a myriad of musicians coming together to create a single symphony.” Or, if classical music isn’t your thing, you can be a “person standing on a dog, who in turn is standing on a crocodile.” And using those analogies, you can understand why you watch pizza and eat porn. Or, if you prefer, watch porn and eat pizza. Whatever it is that you do, it is human. It is beautiful.

What about Mr. Rogers and porn?

You’re correct. I am taking every opportunity to use Mr. Rogers and porn together. And the reason? You need to love yourself. The quote of Mr. Rogers that I used yesterday talked about loving yourself as you are. He wasn’t talking about loving the past version of you. Nor was he talking about loving some future version that you want to become. Love who you are in your current being. Now. 

Shortly after writing that post about hating myself and learning to love me (thanks, Mr. Rogers), I cracked open Mike’s book about me being a miracle and a pain in the ass. (FYI, people have called me a pain in the ass many, many times.) The quote used to open the book reassured me that I was reading the right thing at the right time:

“Be assured that our questions are just as important as our answers

– Fred “probably never watched porn” Rogers

Maybe he did watch porn; I don’t know. I’m not judging. The point is, we need to be curious about this world. We need to ask questions, even if those questions don’t have answers. In whatever we discover, we need to be okay with it, because that’s the answers that we found. It is ours. And that’s how we begin to love ourselves and to love one another.

Stay tuned to my site as I continue to pursue love, curiosity, and presence. I’ll also come back and share more of my thoughts on Mike’s book, once I’ve finished it. But, if you want to know how Tinder and turkeys are similiar, you’ll have to read the book yourself.

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